NewEvolution's movie Reviews on Newgrounds

[TIGF presentation.]

Is there SUPPOSED to be a point to this?

Ok......so.......it's 4 pages of text....that fade in and out too fast to read.....in different and clashing fonts.....and aligned in no particular location.

I'm usually pretty understanding in my rating but...

Congrats.

You're the recipient of my first ever NG blam.

Wow..this is bad.

[21: 08.15am- 08.18am]

The bagel shtick drug a bit...

But other than that it was funny as hell...especially the Avril bit. Your bomb-damaged clock was pretty damn cool too...though I'm not really sure how parts of an LCD can fall of and swing in the breeze. Your style reminds me of "Family Guy," which is a good thing. The only thing I might change (other than speeding up the bagel bit) is making the bobby's mustache wiggle a bit when he spoke...he didn't move at all, and it stuck out a bit. Nice work.

[When Baseballs Attack]

Give the fuck up.

Ok... 3.9 fucking megabytes, and not only do you not have a pre-loader, you don't even have a title screen with a play button. I've got to sit there for an indeterminate and assinine amount of time staring at an EXTREMELY poorly drawn picture of a road, and THEN, once the movie finally loads, I have to FUCKING RIGHT CLICK ON YOUR FLASH AND CHECK THE PLAY OPTION MY GODDAMN SELF?!?!?!

Honestly, Flash snaps lines to other lines' endponts AUTOMATICALLY and you can't manage to connect the outlines of your crappy road's dashed center line?

The design and art I saw in the first minute of loading were so utterly crap-tastic that I couldn't be bothered waiting any longer. Do us all a favor. Learn how to make a pre-loader, and if not that, learn how to make a fucking button on a title screen at the very least.

[IG.net in space]

One big inside joke

This would only be vaguely entertaining to those who knew the people who appear in the cameos. As I have no F'in clue who those people were, this was a huge waste of my time.

[Newfieland Sucks By]

Well...the slide was sort-of funny

But other than that this was totally weak. If it wasn't for the slide you'd be blammed by me....as is it's only about a 0.003, but i guess 1 will have to do.

[Seinfeld: Easter Special]

Hella weak

Wow....i was expecting nothing more than a long scrolling list of pi to umpteen-bajillion decimal places set to music. That would have almost been cool. This however sucked. Crappy, unoriginal sprite animation, god-awful scrolling of pi as a block of text, and music that didn't load, all with a background of flashing solid color....and no pre-loader. Worthless.

[housechase part1]

So odd, it's good

VERY strange. So strange in fact, that it's different from most other things on here. That alone is worth some serious points.

[Mystic SpaceShip Part 6]

Wow...that was poor

You call that a part 6? Next to nothing happened. The music was sampled at some horrible bit rate and sounded like it was playing from inside a cardboard box located down a long metal hallway. Take a tip from daily comic strips. Next time you write a soryline at least have something get resolved in each part, otherwise people aren't going to watch them.

LeninsTomb responds:

FUCKING BITCH! B WILL NOT STAND FOR YOUR IGNORANCE!

[Super happy fun circus!!!]

i think you possesed me or some shit

for some unknown reason almost all your shit kicks ass in my head. that music rules...oh the oddity. finish the don't kill the ninja series damnit...it's my favorite. i think i smoke too much of them tweeds....eh, what the fuck. make more wacky stuff.

[Do You Yahoo!?-retake]

do you Yahoo!?

hehehe...i love it when a portal entry makes me laugh out loud. the feel of the Yahoo! comercial was perfect, as were the sound effects. add that to the fact that the HK MP5-K is my favorite sub-machine gun (am i crazy for having a favorite sub machine gun?) and you got yourself a good movie. my one criticism, your characters look just like every other character in these portal movies...find a style and run with it. overall....kickass!

Chuck responds:

wait...are you saying my drawing sucks? j/k. I see what you mean, though. It's pretty cool getting a good review from the same guy that did peas. I'll make sure to review yours.